It’s been quite an intense October around here, particularly the last two weeks, as I’ve felt each day has bought another wave of challenges to negotiate my way through.
It’s nothing that most of you haven’t dealt with recently I’m sure: difficult financial decisions to make; double cancer news in extended family; daily challenges with the children and trying to remain consistent and loving; children’s sickness as well as my own; etc. My late father’s birthday passed last week, and I contemplated the loss of his life; and three years on, I still feel a deep grief that doesn’t fade with time.
The challenges and struggles that friends have been facing have weighed upon me as I’ve felt powerless to do anything to ease their suffering. I’ve wanted to jump into rescue mode, but see that all I can do is love, encourage and strengthen as much as I have grace to do so.
I’m not overwhelmed, but I’ve felt the heaviness on my heart, and an opportunity to get into the quiet where I can re-energise has been beyond reach.
I share all this with you, not to pour out my struggles but I want to share how my heart responds when I get to the point of…. enough.
Here’s the way through that I see:
- There’s the revelation that my circumstances do not control me. But that I can experience God in them. I have an opportunity to move into a greater understanding and revelation of His character and nature, and deepen my heart-to-heart connection with Him.
- There’s the invitation to worship the Father, to gaze upon who He is, and await the evidence of His victory in my life.
- There’s the reminder that I am to think of the interests of others, constantly bringing them before His throne of mercy. It’s freely giving what I have freely received.
- When I find myself flooded with thoughts of negativity towards myself, I’ve usually spent too much time thinking of me, and not enough looking outside myself. Where should I be serving/praying/loving/giving?
- There’s the truth of His word, that ‘His grace is sufficient and His power made perfect in my weakness’. It’s true. And I need to meditate on it until it renews my mind!
- I am so deeply thankful for my life and all that it’s filled with. It’s such a good habit to get into to intentionally give thanks daily.
I watched this tonight (see below) and found myself come alive with the possibilities that the Lord may have for my life and for those around me. It reminds me that there’s a wider purpose that we can all participate in that’s beyond our current realm of understanding. I may not go to Africa like Heidi. But I’m called to love and change the atmosphere around me, bringing heaven to earth, and respond to His pursuit of love towards me.
I love this one from Graham Cooke”
“In all the places where something is against you, you get to discover the power of what is within you. You can change the atmosphere. You can create a different environment just by letting loose your own internal agreement with the Holy Spirit and releasing your expectation of God”
Life is such an incredible gift. I know the handful of things He’s asking me to be faithful with today. I’m not too sure about tomorrow yet. But I know He’s already there, and He’s already considered every possibility, overcome every obstacle, and created a way for me to partner with Him in victory.